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Cake day: January 30th, 2025

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  • The culture I grew up in was as a Mormon in the Rocky Mountains. They don’t do matchmaking per se, but the Mormon church has specific congregations for specific phases of life. There are “family wards”, for Mormons who are married with kids, “seniors’ wards” in nursing homes and retirement homes so elders don’t have to travel as far for church on Sunday, and “Singles’ Wards”.

    As soon as you turn 18, you basically get sentenced to Singles’ Ward until you manage to get a girlfriend/boyfriend. The cultural expectation is heavy enough that you’ll get a lot of weird looks if you’re still going to church with your parents as a 19-year old. Mormon churches are very activity-heavy, so during the week there will be a ton of church-sponsored group-date and double-date events. And because Mormons are really serious about the premarital chastity thing, they usually get married before they ever realize just how big a commitment that is.

    I found out I was gay while I was in Singles’ Ward. Mormonism is a VERY homophobic religion. Things got awkward really, really fast.